Heart on high alert
Frustration rising
Panic coursing through blood
Time excruciatingly painful
Every tic a pounding
A rhythm of frenzied dread
Waiting to hear
Waiting to know
Terrified of truth
Nagging doubt
Praying your wrong
Waiting
Nervous
Frightened
Hope almost out of reach
Disarmed
Begging to get an update
Then you hear the five words
The five words that change your life
“We did everything we could”
Creeping obscure
Surreptitiously vile
A shadow of bile
Taking me to slaughter
Crushing my head
In pestle and mortar
Mental mutilation
Heart in a vice
Brain sliced
Rumination poised at the brink
Disaster choking emotion
Intent unspoken
Torture sick and profane
Inane
Mindless abyss
Barren and void
Shadow traveler is driving me insane
Shadow companion
Leaves me abandoned
Lonely and stranded
Remanded disbanded
And branded
A loser
Shadow traveler controlling my ride
Destroying my pride
Ripping out segments of my esteem
My dreams
Hidden destroyer
Paranoia
Scraping the insides of my mind
Leaving me blind
Can never escape your shadow
Or what’s hidden behind
The scars on her wrist
Betray her despair
Nothing there
Barren and bare
No one cares
Pain behind her eyes
Reflects empty visions
Unreachable missions
A life of omission
No one to share
Nobody cares
The tremble in her voice
Screams please end my life
The struggles and strife
Unanswered prayers
Life’s never fair
No one cares
Success inside a box of greed
Wall street weed
Cocaine and speed
Not enough… gimme more
A bright downpour
A capital gain
And neon rain
Give me your money
Praise my name
My checkbook commands you
Kneel in vain
Tremble in my presence
More important than god
More powerful than Satan
Praise me and be humble peasants
And don’t complain
For I am rich
In neon rain
So exalt his name
The one he got at birth
Made him what he’s worth
The family jet plane
Flying high above the glow
The flow
And pain
Of the neon rain
Pyrite darkness at his core
Gold running through his veins
Basking in the afterglow
Of his oft ill gotten gains
And neon rains
He took from us
Behold him majestic
Bombastic
So fantastic it’s drastic
But to me he’s plastic
Just a John Doe
Living in a condo
With stain glass windows
And alters of pain
Built from neon rain
Behold
Rising above you
Looking so handsome
So tan yet so vain
Basking from the glow
Of grimy neon rain
Monster dressed in silk
Beady rhinestone eyes
Heart of pyrite power
Deals in cheats and lies
Neon rain never falls
Never fails
Money prevails
Inside the Ivory tower
Above the neon shower
Thinks he’s immune to our distain
Lavish him in platinum
Uncork another magnum
Fill the chalice for his palace
With the sweat of our champagne
Behold him with his playthings
Hottest ladies on fine China
Diamond studded vagina
Stroked like a rigid ego
Everywhere that we go
Rich boys will be rich boys
Spreading prepaid toys
Over silk embroidered sheets
Where kink and pleasure meets
In bed with Cinderella
Covered in a gold umbrella
He cannot feel the distain
From the angry neon rain
So praise him
His money train
Or walk away wet
In the neon rain
It happened far too early when
The walls of his playpen fell in
Somber loneliness rushed the gate
Followed him out to the playground
Alone in a crowd of children
Hurt he was
Making a plan
An education met with sneers
Weight of the world in a backpack
Classrooms without principles
Falling victim to ridicule
Alone in the lunchroom
Friendless he was
Making a plan
Meaningless tasks they call a career
A hamster wheel in race full of rats
A medical plan does not make the man
Internal decay what’s a madman to do
Bide some time make some cash
Disillusioned he was
Making a plan
Over the border to where nobody watches
To purchase the power he could never obtain
A lifetime of angst on top of his back
A life of ridicule and rage inside his coat
Concealing his emotions he concealed a gun
Fed up with his life
He had a plan
Remember my name
When you assign the blame
I’m the monster from under your bed
My bullet tranquilizer
Is a great equalizer
Its society sins for which they have bled
My memoir to you
Of what I must do
Shredding lives of families I won’t ever meet
Many people will die
At the blink of an eye
Until you get all the death sticks off of the street
He held his yesterdays tight in his hands
But it always slipped through his fingers
On his journey of self destruction
He took us all along
As was his plan
Standing naked before you
Vulnerable and afraid
Anguish in word
Trepidation in song
Emotionally blurred
Trembling brushes
Their soul on display
Frightened waits the artist
Awaiting applause
Fearing the ridicule
But our art is our cause
Using potions and lotions to mask our emotions
As we parade our wounds and our scars
For your gratification we suffer frustration
Then go drowning our sorrows at bars
A cavalcade of mental lacerations
Through the center of town
See the procession of distressed musings
The Splendor of our pain
In plain sight for all to enjoy
We’ll allow you a glimpse
Into a world of macabre
Struggles we faced
With love we tussle and toil
A labor of love
To help shed a light
Bring radiance to the obscure
Lucidity in an enigmatic abstract
Luster from our souls
Wounded yet strong
Brighten the path of our pith
Allowing you to see into our thoughts
To see yourself
Art is a mirror
A reflection of you
Distortedly real
In my mind
Harshly we judge ourselves so the judges won’t give us new pains
We carry on
Enduring torture in living
Tempered by numbness
To help show the way
The teardrops flow at the strum of a string
Someone singing a song of despair
Painful pictures of reality
Or sweet memories to canvass
In word, in song, in pictures
We see life and report
Groaning from lessons so hard
Disparagement festers in my heart
Flowing through my fingertips
Connected to my mind
Creative thought
Born of aches
Shared internal
Shaken from sneers
Fragile
Ready to bare the soul
Reality is sometimes hard
Not always kind
If you’re sighted yet still remain blind
We let you see inside with our creative wings in flight
We struggle in our darkness so you can see the light
Artists…..show them love but
Handle with care
Tomorrow
One day early
Yesterday
One day late
Today is the day
Make something happen
Celebrate
Don’t worry about tomorrow
It knows the way
Don’t live in your history
It never stays
Yesterday is gone
Today will be great
Celebrate
Tomorrow is a future someday way back when
Stay inside the now
Today
Before it becomes yesterday
And re-occurs
As it always does
Not gonna fill my closet with regrets
Or store broken dreams hidden in my attic
Don’t wanna end up with a pile of would have beens
And mountains of wish I hads
Too steep to climb
Woulda coulda shoulda
Believe me I have scads
Wandering aimlessly
Procrastinated into complacency
Graciously waiting patiently
For hope to fill the vacancy
Now all the piles are swept away
And all I have left today
Is too many unfinished yesterdays
History is important
But the most important history
Is the history you make today
Reveling we glistened
Sensual luminescence
Kissed by the sun
Hedonic happy days
Owned by the sunrise
Romantic evenings
Belonged to the moon
On the River of Love
Fires of devotion
Rose above the bank
Celebrating a love
Blazing eternal
An epoch ago
Owners of the night
We dreamt by day
So many sunsets
Passed over our eyes
Searing our hearts
Combusting our souls
Swimming impassioned
Smoldering erotic across
The Burning River of Love
Two bodies entwined
In ancient ritual
Embracing naked
Waxing euphoric
Aroused by desire
Charred from passion
Rapturously content
Until we stumbled
In the wake of a flood
Joined by our ghosts
From our own shadows
Swept up in the current
Pulled apart
Three times under
Drowning in the River of Love
Separated we travel
Gradient in thought
Split across two rapids
Distant cascading rumblings
Unable to negotiate
An alliance of paradise
Our pact of unity
Ruptured
Forming new rivulets
Searching new ground
Dew drops from our eyes
Glistened in the morning reeds
Pieces of our hearts
Floating our own ways
Down The River of Love
Sometimes that’s just the way the river flows
Love follows the path of least resistance
Though at times it seems hard maneuvering
Rolling and dancing changing downstream
The river it always holds the promise of love
Drink in the river and sing its song of love
Jump in the water and let it take you along
Though its waters sometimes run treacherous
And the river charts the course of its choosing
Its always worth the ride
Apathetic Winds Of Freedom
My Props to the Beat poets who changed our perceptions and ushered in an era of open mindedness
People fighting over flags
Killing for biscuits
that’s nowhere
Why should I care
I know what happens when you resist
Get caught in the wind of hate
Blow away
Not me
I just don’t care
I’m not chasing no windmills
Not for tulips anyway
Not gonna cut off my ear
Just to hear some music
Holding on to my sanity
Don’t need help from no stranger
I’m just gonna ride in the wind
The wind of apathy
For free
Bag your own groceries dude
I don’t work for you
I’m not your rag time man
I’m not taking no stand
I won’t vote for you
Ill be late for the debate
You can be the vice president
Makes you important I don’t care
My bag if full of unclean air
I am I said
Pathetically apathetic
So ill never drive a Lexus
Big deal
Never float on a luxury hotel
So what
Ill walk the mile if need be
In my own damn moccasins
Rather than take biscuit crumbs
From the tables of affluence
I don’t want their spare change
Maybe I’ll just go wind sailing
Riding high in the sky
Riding my apathy
To nowhere in particular
You think you’re free?
You’re a marionette
Don’t get choked by the strings
There ain’t Blue Fairy
No island of pleasure
Freedom is hazardous people
You really have to want it
You can’t keep it in your garage
You can’t hold it for yourself
You have to let it go
Set it free in the winds
The winds of apathy
Woke up confused
Eyes shut open wide
Remembered a dream
Love so deep inside
Passion in the air
Undiluted truth
Silk and satin sheets
Unbridled youth
Was it a fantasy
Cosmic deception
Maybe just a wish
Looking for perception
Heaven?
Hell?
Hard to tell
But we were
What we were
Riding supernova waves
High on living life
Sleeping in the sun
Rising up at noon
Loving in the dark
Shadows in the night
Crying in the stars
Laughing at the moon
Until one day
My smile
Got up and left
Leaving a void in its wake
Much too soon
Pain
Tattooed on my soul
Dismay
A scar in my heart
Anger
In tears that I cry
Despair
From falling apart
Desolation
Promised sorrow
Bleakness
My one true belief
Hurt
Left in the wake
Death
Omnipresent relief
My Props to the Beat poets who changed our perceptions and ushered in an era of open mindedness
People fighting over flags
Killing for biscuits
that’s nowhere
Why should I care
I know what happens when you resist
Get caught in the wind of hate
Blow away
Not me
I just don’t care
I’m not chasing no windmills
Not for tulips anyway
Not gonna cut off my ear
Just to hear some music
Holding on to my sanity
Don’t need help from no stranger
I’m just gonna ride in the wind
The wind of apathy
For free
Bag your own groceries dude
I don’t work for you
I’m not your rag time man
I’m not taking no stand
I won’t vote for you
Ill be late for the debate
You can be the vice president
Makes you important I don’t care
My bag if full of unclean air
I am I said
Pathetically apathetic
So ill never drive a Lexus
Big deal
Never float on a luxury hotel
So what
Ill walk the mile if need be
In my own damn moccasins
Rather than take biscuit crumbs
From the tables of affluence
I don’t want their spare change
Maybe I’ll just go wind sailing
Riding high in the sky
Riding my apathy
To nowhere in particular
You think you’re free?
You’re a marionette
Don’t get choked by the strings
There ain’t Blue Fairy
No island of pleasure
Freedom is hazardous people
You really have to want it
You can’t keep it in your garage
You can’t hold it for yourself
You have to let it go
Set it free in the winds
The winds of apathy
Terrapin - The Journey 