Forgotten How To Care

abandoned_playground_by_questa_durron

 

 

Where do the unfortunate children live?

Charred basements

Broken windows

Hinge less doors

Cracked walls

Torn up floors

Abandoned palaces

Way beyond our gated paradises

Far away so we won’t have to see

 

 

 

 

Where do the unfortunate children play?

Septic swamplands

Dead grass

Scorched earth

Forgotten swing sets

Junkyard Hell

Running on decay

Chewing paint chips

Shredded promise soufflé

Far away

Not near you

Hidden from our guarded suburbs

 

 

If we sweep them under the rug will they still exist?

Can we hide them away from where the moneys made?

Shield us from their tears

Remove their squalor from our sight

Pretend they’re not still here

Hide away their despair

Where we never have to see them

Where we no longer look

Yet still hear them cry

Without listening

Without asking why

 

 

Why should I have to share what’s mine just because their lazy

Its not my problem not my fault

Let someone else foot their bills

Let someone else buy their shoes

Put food into their bellies

Shelter them from storms

The big game is on TV tonight

My fridge is full of excuses

I have no time to hear the plight

Let me watch the latest shows

Not some documentary to remind me I once cared

At a time when I believed in caring

 

 

 

 

Anyway that was a long time ago

I was filled with lofty ideals then

In youth I believed in so much

It seemed we all had a dream

A vapor really

Breath on glass

Bold and large

Mirror dreams

Wiped away with self ambition

Dissipated with fumes of self indulgences

Into nothing

Compassion disappeared from my looking glass

Leaving a reflection of myself

The face of one who forgot

A face of shame

No salary can buy it away

No ambition can veil the self contempt

No status symbol can wash away regret

Of forgetting how to care

Shame on those of us who abandon our hidden neighbors

So wrapped up in ourselves

That we have forgotten how to care

Remember the days

we all promised

To lend hand

To wipe their tears

 

 

Peace

 

Torn Out Page

torn

 

From the book of me

A page torn

Of a life forlorn

Sipping on scorn

Swallowing thorns

A torn out page

From a book of rage

Much too full of age

And too short on sage

 

No matter how fast my legs may take me

The past sneaks behind as if to forsake me

When I think it has left its still there behind me

With a lightning flash searing it blinds me

Filling my pages with misguided dreams

Promises made were not what they seemed

 

 

 

The days of my youth

Define me as reckless

Ill thought plans

My mirror reflection

The heart of rebellion

The brains of a fool

Trying to be popular

Hoping to be cool

Living in consequence

Doing my time

Running away

But its always behind

But time catches up in fiery vengeance

Rifts made so deep no time can mend it

A constant reminder of all I have been

Swimming is whisky dancing with sin

Young and naïve not taking life serious

All that enthusiasm made me delirious

Times heals superficial leaving pain deep inside

A future to outrun with a past I can’t hide

But one thing I have learned

The pain doesn’t stay

It may seem eternal

But it slithers away

Leaving a trail

Scars in our hearts

Tattooed on our souls

Etched on our parts

Ashen and pale

We look to the sky

Unreachable goals

So why even try

 

Look in my eyes soaked profound in despair

Eyes deep of wrinkle and a head without hair

Life is just a wisp of breath like vapors on a mirror

The older your eyes the more you see clearer

Truths are written if my orbs can stay open

Until the breath dissipates erasing times slogan

 

 

The story of a life

From start to finish

Written on the wind

Like words in a scrimmage

Once the protagonist

Now just a viewer

The nights they get longer

As the days become fewer

Spirit and sage on every stage

Acting the fool and feeling the rage

When the last chapter rises

Revealing a crisis

Just a torn out page

Time spent in a cage

Looking to be free

Of myself

That’s me

An anecdote in the rain

Gathering pain

As it runs down the drain

Sometimes life sucked

My arms holding sin

Belly full of gin

Never knowing where to begin

Or how to lose or how to win

Living stagnant

Dying slow

Here’s where its at

Take my advice let it go

 

 

Life sucks so suck it up

Stop whining about life and change it

Only you can rearrange it

Don’t be a drag

Make your life what you want

Or hoist the white flag

 

Live for today….Peace

 

My Judgment

judge

 

 

Tried my whole life

Not to sit in judgment

Of other peoples looks

Choice of expression

Or religious belief

But the one judgment I cannot escape

Is judging the content of the heart

And I make no apology

I make no excuse

And I will not stop

To judge people based on the depth of their self

Regardless of appearance or expression

Because I would rather lay dead in a world full of peace

Than walk one day more in a world full of hate

That is why I convene in judgment

Like it or not

 

Remove your veil

Reveal your heart

And if it pours love you shall always know peace

Hide behind that veil

It will breed contempt

And you will be blind in a life full of anger

Your choice

My judgment

 

Time to Go ( Final Love Song)

time to go

 

When its time for me to go

When I cant stay here anymore

When its time for me to leave

Will you walk me to the door

Hold me closely just once more

Before…..

My heart begins to grieve

I’ll tear my heart off of my sleeve

When its time for me to leave

 

 

 

Its my time

I have to go

Not your fault

I loved you so

Our yesterdays

So far away

My tomorrow

Has come today

My time is here

My world is dark

The next adventure

Left to embark

 

 

 

When my welcome mat is frayed

My final hands been played

Will you walk me to my home

Remember days we once had known

I don’t want to be alone

But this day I can’t postpone

It’s time to leave

There’s nothings left

Left to improve on

So its time that I move on

I have to leave

 

 

Its my time

I have to go

Not your fault

I loved you so

our yesterdays

So far away

My tomorrow

Is here today

My time is here

My world grows dark

One last adventure

To embark

 

 

 

 

When its time for me to go

The time has come

My final exit

There is no time

I just accept it

Maybe regret it

Will you walk me down that path

Take away my ire and wrath

Allow me some release

Let me leave here with a little peace

Will you walk me to my car

Write our names up on a star

Sing a song as I go out

Then shout

That you miss me

With a sweet melody

So I can sing it back to you

As I leave

 

 

And I know that you are hurting

But I face the final curtain

Just want you to know

As you walk me to my sleep

I’ll always love you

Your heart I’ll keep

But its time for me to go

So

Will you walk me to me bed

With your arms around my head

Remember days we both had shared

Hold me tight because I’m scared

But we both know

Its time to go

 

 

 

Anecdote (p.I)

anecdote I

 

Anecdote

(Inspired by the fabulous Welch poet Mr. Zimmerman chose as a namesake)

 

 

In the end we are all just ghosts in the lives of those we encounter that share an importance to our own lives. Life is not a straight line or a cycle but an elaborately moving thread that touches millions of other threads in the ultimate fabric of the universe. Sometimes certain threads become entwined for long periods of time and become part of someone else’s patch of cloth, someone else’s story. Once we are gone our names begin to echo off the canyons of life in search of a legacy. We may never find it here on Mother Earth.

 

 

We are but anecdotes in each others lives

 

The moon smiled as it whispered her name

The wind screamed I love you to the sky

Perhaps a bit too loud

The sun clasped tight the latch of day

Sealing in the evening’s sweet song

Perhaps a bit too short

Gracefully she strutted across my life

I  behind in a cascade of stardust

An anecdote in the wake of her stride

 

 

 

Bound in passions of leather and lace

Squealing the promise of surrender

Bodies wrapped in tenuous pleasure

Tightly clung to our mutual destiny

She held me tight in the eyes of her world

Imprisoned was my weakened soul

Counting each breath in hope eternal

Feeling each beat of her rapturous heart

Knowing my devotions would one day become

A mere anecdote of her days gone by

A short chapter in her story of life

 

 

 

 

 

I peered deeply into my paranoia

The tide waning to an uncertain sea

Together we had floated o’er the oceans

Treacherous waves rising before the storm

Time was at hand

Exchanging glances to reveal our fears

She pulled my face tenderly to her breast

Comforted on her cloud of  compassion

We had entered the phase of our final countdown

We hastily reminisced with the ghosts of the fates

Solitude will be a continuous torture

Who were we, who was I, who am I now?

The years seemed deep and long of tragedies

Alone I face the story’s close

The Lone Protagonist

In the end merely an anecdote

To everyone I’ve ever known

 

The Hard Way

hard way

 

Everything in life is a gamble. The odds vary and the rewards vary and so do the risks. We begin to gamble from our very first breath and we continue to gamble until our last. Money, thrills, careers, love, and life. We gamble because life is a risk and I’ve taken many…….

 

The Hard Way

 

 

Take the long shot

The last toss across

A one roll bet

Curbside knucklebones

Ivory cubes of faith

Don’t make me wait

Give me a sign

Place those dots in line

Seven come eleven

Been so down lately

I’ll take whatever you’re giving

Come what may

This is my life

The hard way

 

Ante up

The chips are down

Feed the kitty

Deal a round

Maybe a boat

Or the dead mans hand

Take me down Broadway Lord

That’s a real plan

Been hitting too many potholes

My tell is showing clear

Been on the losing side of life

Been getting drunk on beer

Life ain’t so great

Just this one time

A royal inside straight

One last draw Lord

The river for my play

Gimme a raise

The hard way

 

Pick a pony pacer

Put me on the fast track

Help me play the odds Lord

A rougher or a mud lark

Long shot or quinella

Odds across the board twice

At least the daily double

Triple would be nice

My Life is in a dead heat

On the dark horse trot

Be the one to beat

Let my luck run hot

A strong one in the chute

Really need a winner

Give me a good one today

That’s my dream

That’s my life

The hard way

 

 

Play them odds

At the table

Fifty to one will work

Praying for a win streak

Just a tiny perk

Been down so long I can’t see up

I’m slow at the pass line

Doubling down on everything

So tired of always losing

stuck on the rotted end

Load it up to let it ride

All in on one bet

Don’t call my bluff

Lord I swear ain’t lying

Give me just one let

All or nothing

Its on the number

Roulette ball is spinning fast

Losing is a bummer

I need a big one

Or I’m cashing in my token

This time I swear I ain’t joking

Giving it all away

And I’ll take my loss

The hard way

 

Time Chase

unfinished

We grab on desperately to our caches of memories petrified that if we lose them we have nothing left. Then on day we realize that those memories are merely vapors from echoes we once screamed from the mountaintops. It’s a tragedy when we run out of life before we run out of time…..

Life running out

Time standing still

Once full of wonder

He’s now had his fill

Behind his old sparkle

The light it grows dim

Underneath the smile

Is a world dark and grim

Running out of verve

But not out of time

Harder day by day

To be towing the line

Don’t let them see it

Don’t let them stare

Light up your candle

Hide from the glare

Condition and acceptance

That’s what they expect

When everything’s gone

You’ll still have respect

Give wink and a nod

Say everything’s great

Life will catch up to them too

Time is our fate

Shake Hands With The Devil

praise

 

 

His light was dark

Yet still my beacon

He led and I followed

Laughing and freaking

Awash in his repugnant fervor

My life preserver

Saving me

Praised by me

He used my primal fears

To console me

Control me

Owned my soul

Imprisoned me unto myself

Chained to my thoughts

I loved him

 

His hot breath on my skin

Felt like sin

Beautiful and gory

Exulted in glory

I was humbled in his presence

The great pretender

Soul mender

I surrendered

Unto his glory

Blinded by his majesty

Beholden in apathy

Serving him

Observing him

My kiss of death preserving him

Now and forever

I love him

 

Lord of all darkness

Giving me life

Reason

A purpose

A surplus

Of anger and hate

So sweetly irate

I need him

Need to be near him

To enter his gate

The gate of Hell

The putrid smell

His body so wet

Of black vile sweat

Pungent and beautiful shining off his flesh

I love him

Praise him

Shake his hand

Taste his blood

Oozing with vile hatred

Please him

Praise him

Squeeze him

Raise him

He is alive

He has risen

He is the power and the glory

Let me glow in his darkness

Deliver me to him

I love him

 

Cerebral Cabal

cerebral

 

Fireflies behind my eyes

Fluttering about

Blinking

Chattering

Softly first

Then screaming

Shut up!

Make them go away

They don’t belong

Who are they?

Why are they in my head?

The answer is within

I am anger

Rage

Livid pain

Burning eyes

Staring hatred

Searing skin

I am you

I am fear

Shivering alone

Petrified

Trembling pain

Paralyzed by thought

Stuck in your worthless void

I am you

I am insignificance

The losing team

Last place

Again

Dejected and ashamed

I suck

Its your fault

I am you

I am guilt

Mortified

Humiliated

Crying in the shadows

Face charred red

Head hung low

Abased, abused

I am you

I am contempt

Displeased

Disgusted

Rotting in your presence

Disdainfully at your side

Putrid vile fool

I am the stench of you

I am you

I am disgrace

Undeserving

Ridiculous

Pity the petty maggot

 

We are you

United and free

You’re cerebral cabal

We are desperation

We are loud

Listen to us

We are you

You are us

All talking at the same time

So an idiot slug like you understands

You are nothing

Open your ears

Hear the disgust

Open your eyes

See the truth

You are an aberration

Miscreant

Wretched piece of nothingness

Go now

Hurt someone

Devour someone

Kill someone

Kill yourself

 

Quiet!

Its you that must die

A capsule of therapy

To help me forget you

A bottle of strength

To shut you up

Make you scatter

Make you leave

You never stop

Leave me alone

You are not me

I am not you

I will stop you all

It will end

We will end

All things must end so let my ending be a new beginning or let me go to sleep

 

Pieces Of The Past

yesterday

 

Tiny brushstrokes of a portrait

Pieces on a canvass

Time bandits

Stealing moments

Charting memories

A life on loan

In the end alone

Just pieces of the past

 

Yesterdays pieces of ourselves

Parts of our puzzles

Triumphs and troubles

Maps of our experiences

No glory just our story

What are were

Flesh blood and bone

In the end alone

Just pieces of the past

 

Lyrics of our songs

Sung with glee

Enthused

Tempered with blues

Notes on a scale

With a soft groan

A whispering moan

In the end alone

Just pieces of the past

 

We are the words of our poem

Gloriously described

On our hearts inscribed

Words of love

Hopes and dreams

Written by us

And those we have known

In the end alone

Just pieces of the past

 

A patch quilt of memories

Past and present

The good and bad

Bought and spent

Inerasable lines

Deep and furrowed

Reaped and sown

In the end alone

Just pieces of the past

Never meant to last

Pieces of a storm

Here and gone

Passing through

Today

Never meant to stay

How fast we’ve grown

To be alone

Alone at last

Just pieces of the past

Visit but don’t stay in yesterday for the destination is not of our choosing. Our journeys however belong solely to us….PEACE