Who Is God And Is he an Existentialist?

 

 

(An excerpt from “Cosmo And The Garden Earth”)

Now I’ve done more than my fair share of hallucinogens in my day but believe me this was no chemically induced manifestation. The most remarkable thing happened. Cosmo’s arms came right through my computer screen and grabbed by the shoulders. As if I had been transformed into a wavelenghth of pixilation energy I entered into the story coming face to face with the god I had been writing about. I was confused beyond galactic proportions, “Oh My Cosmo, did I die?” My mind was racing. No harp music, that has to be a good sign, but there he was as big as life. His voice was less godly than I anticipated, no thundering roars, just a friendly statement as if he were a college professor, “I understand you have some profound questions JT. Come with me and I will try to give you the answers. We’ll be traveling in a way you are unfamiliar with so just remain quiet and observe” I was stunned but in some sort of trance. Cosmo took my hand and even though I had a keyboard full of questions I walked alongside this sprirty thing in silence. We walked through some type of city street then through a building. I then realized it was the New York Stock Exchange but it was cold and unlit and we could hear people trying hard to yell over each other. It was as though I were seeing it in different dimensions piled on top of each other. Epiphany! We were. Through another dimension and we found ourselves walking through a bank, also cool and unlit this time filled with voices in a language I could not understand. Through another dimension we found ourselves in some sort of foreign government building, a palace or some ultra rich home, and finally through a concrete graveyard. Just as quickly as it had gotten cold and dark a light appeared and a wave of warmth spread over my body. We were walking along a beach I had gone to many times in my younger days, and then through the familiar streets of my youth. The city that watched me grow from a boy into a man. The schoolyard field I learned to place baseball in, the playground complete with see saw where I learned the mechanics and necessity of teamwork, school, cars, bars, all of my youth. He led to some sort of park that was filled with elements of my past life. Everywhere I could see and hear children playing and laughing. I couldn’t help but smile as Cosmo walked me through the most carefree times of my life. At long last we came to a path in a wooded area that led to a clearing. “There JT, over there. We can sit there and talk.” I almost ran up to the clearing and found a spot to sit. I had so many questions and I wasn’t sure where to start but as it happened I didn’t need to. Cosmo looked me in the eyes and this is going to sound strange but I got the feeling I was looking at everyone I had ever known. Cosmo spoke clear and soft. “JT, you have many questions and I will try to answer them as simply as possible. First you want to know the purpose of life?” He flashed me the largest and warmest smile I had ever seen.

Its not God that works in mysterious ways JT, its love. Love has the power to create mystery. You remember one of your favorite all time movies? How about this line, “You’ve always had the power to get home. You just needed to learn how to use it?” Its not a co-incidence that it’s a wonderful life came out the same time. “To my brother George, the richest man in town” Through entertainment Love tried in1933 to show you all what’s important and what is real, but it never caught on as anything more than simply entertainment. People still went about learning to hate, to be greedy and jealous. The opposite emotions of love overpowered the minds of humanity.” He sat and stared reflectively out at the children playing so I took the opportunity to ask a question, “Am I dead?”. Again the warm smile, “JT my son, death is not something to fear, its merely a stage. What’s important here is that you understand life, not death. Things are what they are because love lost out to power. The planet earth really is a garden, and it needs cosmic tending. All I’ve done is shown you your history. Just watch a while.”

It was beautiful. Children on see-saws and swings, running and playing tag, climbing on the monkey bars. In the field kids playing kick ball, and softball. I saw young couples walking hand in hand smiling and looking into each others souls, and butterflies and blue jays, intricately woven spider webs, running streams with waterfalls, and wonderful colored animals of all types seemingly dancing. I wondered at first what these sights were all about then as if in a dream I saw the sun rise slowly over the ocean, float across the sky and gently kiss the tops of the trees as it set. Darkness with the largest fullest and most beautiful moon I had ever seen. And it was all alive and covered in sounds of life and love. Then I realized its what Cosmo wanted me to see. The parts of life that make us smile and laugh and give us a feeling that can’t even be found in any words no matter how descriptive. That indescribable feeling of bliss, of such wonderful happiness. The beautiful things around us that need only be seen and appreciated without questioning.
I let this all sink in for a while. It was beginning to Make more sense to me. Our culture created gods and religions for someone to blame for our bad habits and mistakes. I came back from the walk refreshed and I think I was beginning to understand things better. It really is a breathtaking garden filled with so many wonders and so much brilliance. I began to understand what privilege it was to walk in it, and be a part of it. Part of millions of years of life. But the inquisitive nature in me, the hunter instinct if you will, still hade profound questions left. When I got back Cosmo was waiting and ready. I guess he was predicting the future as well. “All this is beautiful Cosmo, and I realize how fortunate I am to be part of it no matter for how long, but I still can’t stop wondering how it all began. Who created the universe?” Cosmo was rubbing his chin and in that instant I thought about how that was exactly what I did when asked a difficult question. “No entity created the universe JT. It has always been and always be, but it will take on different forms. You humans have done incredibly well in your studies. You have discovered the basis of everything. The atom. A center or nuclei with various electrons an neutrons spinning around it. What does that Resemble to you JT? What else has a center with many things spinning around it?” Sometimes an epiphany is so simple you feel like slapping yourself yet the feeling is such an awesome rush. “Your talking about the solar system aren’t you?” I didn’t ask the simple question because I wasn’t sure, I just wanted to hear more. “Yes JT, that’s correct. Everything in the universe has the same basic make up, a center with various types of energy spinning furiously around it. There really is no universe JT, there is a multiverse. A number of universes all spinning around a central nucleus. The universes collide on occasion and are reformed. Tell me JT, have you ever looked into a three sided mirror, you know the type when you try on clothes and want to view your clothing from different angles? You can see yourself in the mirror looking at yourself look in another mirror. And if you look in that mirror what you see is you looking in another mirror. Can you imagine that going on forever? Do you think that at some point you will see yourself not looking in another mirror?” I remembered how fascinated I was as a kid when I looked in the never-ending mirror, but how the hell did he know? As I tried to process the information the best I could muster was a weak “I can dig it.”
“Well now JT we are at the one real question that keeps gnawing at you. Now is the time to answer if there is a god. Is that what you want to know JT?” The nail could not possibly have been hit more squarely on the head. “Well yea, I guess that’s the real question. I mean the universe thing kinda fucked with my head a bit but on some abstract level it makes sense. But what of this God thing, I mean you are obviously here so are you God or…..” Cosmo put up his hand to stop me from talking and allowed a small chuckle to escape. “I guess that’s what we’re here to find out, yes JT?” I shook my head wondering if I were to wake up in an asylum but Cosmo continued. “Yes JT, god does exist but it’s not the God you or anyone else has been taught. Its funny to me how you humans look up to the sky in search of God. You look up as though heaven is up in the sky somewhere. Look out JT, look in front of you, to the left and right side of you. Look behind you..” When I looked out into the woods it was absolutely filled with life. All types of animals and beautiful plants and flowers, and tree’s, all just living happily and freely. “You see that JT? That’s God. All of it. Collectively. God isn’t a creator, not some entity you need to kneel before and worship. What kind of a god would that be? Sounds more like an owner. God is not an owner, god is a state of mind that humans have forgotten and one which has been horrendously forsaken. God is love. That’s why people say God is everywhere JT. You are surrounded by love so always in the presence of God. But you need to love to be love and that means everything. God doesn’t create misery, or suffering, humans did when they began to misuse love. You need to love the slimiest rat or the most beautiful Cat equally, because they are God as well. The cockroaches and spiders you get all jittery over, they are God. You need to lose all the misconceptions you have been taught. You all do if you really want to go on as a species. There is no one or no entity that can save the human race, the human race has to do that.”
I sat there for what seemed like hours and the truth is I have absolutely no idea how long it was. It had been a mindblowing meeting and it took me a long time to sort through everything. So I can dig it, the purpose of life is life, to embrace it and enjoy it and just be a part of it. I know now that a search for the one true god is pointless because it will change nothing, nothing at all. I still don’t understand why there is so much suffering and pain in the world and while I understand the how of war I am at a loss still as to the why. Yet something inside had touched me in a very deep way and I was beginning to think I understood. It was up to me to get the word out, to get other people to understand how great life I and most important that we are on the brink of losing in a war we don’t even know we are in. I had to come up with a way to educate, to warn others but what can I do? I am not a guru, no one really listens to me. Then a thought struck me. All through my life I had learned many good lessons from reading. From the very beginning my Mom and Dad told me stories to help me understand the right thing to do. It’s through stories that we learn the most in life, so I sat down at my keyboard and wondered how I could make this an interesting story that people would enjoy and thereby get Cosmos message out. I was blank for over an hour, then suddenly a thought jumped up and down and grabbed my head in both hands. It was a familiar phrase. “Begin at the beginning.” Simple and not surprisingly when I began at the beginning I was at the middle and at the end, It was beginning to sink in. The cycle of life had always been and always will be, but the characters and locations may change. I wrote this story in the hopes that it may get some people to change the way they think. Then I did what any self respecting human would do. I smiled from ear to ear and continued to enjoy my life.
PEACE

Seeker Of Truth

seeker

 

I knelt naked before a gallery of gods
Waiting in judgment of singular rule
Which divinity will clothe me in faith
I seeker of truth
Searching the chasm of dominions
Pleading for some truth I bared my soul
The mother romancer received me
Adorned me with dreams to dream
Fed me certitude to consume my cynicism
I gave unto her my unwavering fidelity
But it was not truth

 

So many sleeps have come and gone
The dreams so long ago forgotten or gone
Many a deity swaddled me in hypocrisies
I the seeker of truth
Now standing at the dawn of my twilight
Looking to the oracle of enlightenment
Who reveals to me a painting of words
My eyes ached red as I perused salvation
The scriptures given were barren of fact
Yet gleefully exalted in lessons melodic
Cold and calculated I memorized the songs
But it was not the truth

 

I sang of prophesies written on the wind
Which gently blew out the light from the stars
Alone in my darkness I light the lantern of quest
I the seeker of truth
Once more Mother Romancer beckoned me
Asked me to quench her spiritual passions
I gave to her free from the weight of gratitude
Yet still I was cast in the molding of evil
Alone in the unlit passageway I open my eyes
For only from darkness can we truly see light
That is my truth

Too Much Truth

truth

 

The truth can break the bonds which burden you
But too much enlightenment can shine a false beam
Illuminating the nighttime’s with unwanted realities
Casting the darkness of an eclipse upon daylight
Revealing the impurity of our own righteousness
Sculpting our rectitude and directing the moral compass
Seeing too much truth can reveal a lack of honor
Integrity is a marble rock chiseled by truths
The more you take away the more you see
Unless it’s carved into a likeness of the self
If we search the answer in the puddles of ego
Unaware that the reflection is aggrandizing
For all of us stand in the same sunlight
Yet we all cast a uniquely separate shadow
Our silhouettes traced upon the same moon
Yet each exclusive to the music of our own profile
We can stifle the drumsticks that beat our rhythm
We can loosen the strings of our cogent guitars
But we can never stop the songs of our truth
For our legitimacy will lay upon us as a harness
Directing us to places we never knew existed
Perhaps the graveyard where memories go to die
Perhaps the nursery where dreams are conceived
The search existential is far from a mere crisis
It’s a revelation to the edification of true life
Oft times much too hard to carry by oneself
If I could I would hold midnight in my hands
And offer it to you as love to guide you to victory
Because one of my truths is I’m tired of losing
Not of harmonies mislaid but of people gone
I struggle because each day I see all of them
I see their eyes
The hope, the anger, despair and joy
I see them close their eyes to dream
All of them lost as a rainbow at dawn
And that’s too much truth for me to bear

 

 

 

 

Live and Love in Peace

Vote For Me And I’ll Set You Free

vote

 

Yea brothers and sisters, The Existential Baker is considering a run for the Whitehouse. I mean why not? I’m all about change and that’s pretty much what we all want isn’t it? We don’t need politicians, entertainers, or CEO’s to tell us the government is broken, we are all intelligent enough to figure that out ourselves. The government cracked the exact same time the Liberty Bell did but its become more of a huge rift than a crack. Look what’s going on today, people are cheering for what may very well become the first Insulter In Chief of the nation. They’re using messages of anger, hate, and name calling to incite us into making ridiculous decisions just because it will be a change. Do you want change only for the sake of change? Fuck it guys, I could be that change just as easily as a reality show host that is based on deception like all reality shows, a doctor, a CEO, or another same old same old Politian. The difference is I’ll be honest because I‘m not backed by any big business. Truth is, no big business in its right mind would give me a second look. One hell of good a credential when you really think about it.

I mean seriously, look at all the presidential contenders. They look, dress, and talk like they are already for their position in Disney’s Hall Of Presidents. Are you telling me the country couldn’t be run by a group of mellow headed people in tee shirts and sandals better than those dressed in the Wall Street Military uniforms of uniformity ? We’re nothing but votes to those freshly dry cleaned suit wearers, they couldn’t care less about our personal struggles unless we might make good sound bites in their State Of The Union addresses. They are all for alternative fuel while accepting campaign contributions from big oil companies. A candidate backed by war profiteers and tax shelter seeking billionaires. No taxing the rich, no giveaways to the poor, no relief for the “working class”. What is the working class anyway? Someone working a minimum wage job to feed their family is still a worker, just not in the same class as those a little better off. Trickle down economics trickles into the banks of the rich and then disappears. All that money spent on elections someone has to be owing someone else an awful lot of favors. But they will reward us by halting immigration. They have plans to stop immigration so long as their families and servants are already legal. They tell you what you want to hear, what you think the solution is and make you think it was their idea to begin with. They will pamper the religious masses just to kiss their asses and get their vote. Once elected they don’t care but I still will. Vote for me AND I’LL set you free!

Hey, heres some good news guys, they all want to make sure that healthcare insurance companies cover Viagra, but God forgive you if you use your savings to buy condoms, they won’t be covered. Neither will birth control pills ladies, put some cheap aspirin between your legs and deal with your hard man the way God intended. On your knee’s. Check it out, its in the bible somewhere. And if it isn’t they’ll find a scripture that can be bent just enough to in sinuate it. So they are happy to get your man hard for you but please don’t come to our healthcare plans for your “lady problems” like unwanted pregnancies or other “crazy women issues.” Just keep your man happy and hard and while your on your knees say a little prayer to God to apologize for being so……slu….Um, Forward.

So you ask why should you vote for me? Aren’t I one of those tree hugging liberal hippies? Your Goddamn right I’m a tree hugger! Those fucking tree’s give us oxygen, give homes to millions of species of birds and other animals, offer fruits and nuts for all to eat, and they go on and on through harsh winters, brutally dry summers, winds, rains, and whatever nature can throw at them and they still stand tall exuding life giving assistance for anything and everything. When the mighty tree’s do die, they take it on themselves to nourish Mother Earth herself. If that doesn’t deserve a hug I don’t know what does! Am I a tree hugger? Hell yes motherfuckers I am a tree hugger, the bigger question is are you, and if not, why not!

So that’s Why I am considering running for president, because I believe Americans deserve better than the crap choices being offered today. Choosing the lesser of two evils is still an evil. Don’t buy their horseshit phony plans of keeping us wealthy and secure, all they are selling is the illusion of wealth and security so we can go about our daily business comforted in the fact that we are safe. You know, like we hear every time violence strikes a community, that kind of thing just never happens here. Of course it does, it happens anywhere and everywhere. Violence has no geographic limitations and not a single one of them can guarantee our safety. Neither can I, but here’s the difference. I won’t lie to you and make you feel all warm and fuzzy, I’ll give it to you straight. Or gay, what difference does it make? Live and let live, stop telling other people how to live their lives. No red or blue states, united states. United! Like everyone get their shit together and worry about their own lives, mind their own business. We are all one single species, human beings. So if I do decide to run I’m asking you to vote for me not because it’s a change, or I’m not a Politian, but because if you vote for me I’ll set you free! Thanx Y’all Peace out!