Perspective (An experiment in freestyle autobiographic redundancy)

picture frame framing gravel

 

A turtle is a lizard with a Winnebago on its back traveling the world like a gypsy stuck in slow motion

To an alligator an armadillo is merely an escargot on the half shell

To a lobster a shipwreck is an all you can eat buffet

Giraffes aren’t humble because it takes all day to swallow their pride

Why isn’t a chicken too chicken to cross the road

Thoughts like these rob me of sleep because of one thing

Perspective

 

Perspective is the way I view my world

My unstable thoughts may not impress

But my words are just a format

So I use them to express

The perspective of mind that’s not quite right

That’s why I write

 

Is poetry or is it prose

Or just gibberish

Who knows

Is it born of consternation

Making you tremble with trepidation

Or is it all just bullshit

Insanity going through gestation

 

 

Shit here he goes again breaking with tradition

No more rhyming no more rhythm this here is beat generation freestyle crap

The speed of dark seems faster than light when the fire goes out

Universal clout

Lightning is just a highly charged game of cosmic whack a mole

Thunder is the growling of a black holes stomach

How often does the periodic table come around anyway

Does the fortune teller see the future or just see your past in reverse

Why oh why do these ridiculous thoughts only come around when I’m trying to sleep

Ya know what kind of shit keeps my eyes open at night

Perspective

 

 

 

I take up space

I have the time

To write a poem

Does it have to rhyme

Sometimes they don’t

Sometimes they do

I don’t really care

Do you

Anyway its my perspective and I’ll cry if I want to

You would cry too if these thoughts were haunting you

Whether late at night or early in the morn

Perspective drives me crazy

Or is that just my norm

 

Here he goes again

Going off the rails on an Ozzie train of thought

Will this segment rhyme this time or will it be for naught

Some of us have known all along that we differ from the crowd

Some of us are brave enough to write it all out loud

Its what we do

 

The five steps of therapeutic grief as a way for us to fit in

We drink in de Nile

Angrily fight in our minds

Bargain with the voices

Cry when they win

Then give up trying to be sane and accept we’re not to blame

Its just a game

Acceptance is all we want anyway

Don’t judge us and we won’t judge you

Keep in mind there is power in numbers and we have secret warriors

You don’t want to mess around with those voices in our heads

So don’t try to burn down our forests or you will feel our wrath

Only you can prevent forest fires

We look at the world through our own prisms of one thing

Our Perspective

Accept it

 

Just Messin’ Around

messin

 

Silk Tie Samurai swings a platinum hammer

Isabella at his side what a mamma jamma

Big foot Banjo strumming catfish blues

Working for the Samurai to get his baby shoes

Samurai getting high on tabaccky wacky

Exercising downsizing gotta fire a lackey

Silk Tie feeling pissed picks up the silver axe

Just like Dizzy Lizzie gave out forty whacks

Strumming sad was Banjo a blowin’ in the wind

Got the axe cuz he was lax now he’s getting skinned

Cloud nine the hand out line guzzling down his booze

No healthcare welfare and he got nothing left to lose

Lyric spitting Bobby was a preacher smoking grass

Tripping to the other side on a window pane of glass

Tell us bout the weather Bobby tell us bout the times

Dr. Seuss be feeling loose throwing down some rhymes

Searching for some messages in a bottle full of hope

Mr. Jones got him stoned then strung him out on dope

Lulu Voodoo promised Biggie Karmic retribution

A total loss to the boss is Lulu’s Voodoo solution

 

Silt Tie the sneaky guy creeping out with Jill at night

Knocking boots with Juicy Jill somewhere out of sight

Juicy drains the bosses tie then gives an extra shaking

Husband Jack don’t have the knack of brining home the bacon

Yesterday is over but today is on the move

Looking back on happy days getting in a groove

No tell Motel where Isabella done lost her crown

Tie mounted Jill uphill and Jack came tumbling down

Hey man don’t ya let yer past come into play

The most important history is the one you make today

Don’t swim up a waterfall with your head a going under

Won’t see hidden lightning afore ya hear the silent thunder

Bosses secret spinning round caught in the storms eye

When Isabella gets the facts sparks is goanna fly

 

Make love make time I’ll be yours and you be mine

Keep the promise if you wannna have a diamond shine

If you cheat you feel the heat from the fires of divorce

Silkies fly was open wide and Juicy was the source

Sang the song of love gone wrong came like a cinder block

Isabella got all the bucks and Lucy got his…

Locked box treasure stock full of pyrite gold doubloons

Underneath the darkest skies he’s howling at the moons

Crude dude Buddha Belly dressed in a solid gold tuxedo

Turn around he’s outta town where the hell did he go

Now stupid fella and Isabella dancing tangos in her bed

Doesn’t learn a lesson but he getting real good head

Out to the temple where Buddha spews silk advice

Shouting for bloody Hari Kari into the mirror thrice

Now Mr. Luck big bucks owns the Silk Tie Gambling House

His daughter loves a renegade think the dudes a louse

But baby girl with the golden curls opens up her gown

Every time her Running Bear lets his pants fall down

Switchblade Renegade plays baccarat with Silkies daughter

On a bleak losing streak completely drunk on holy water

So Bigfoot and Running Bear got into a big fat hassle

Buddha Belly and Golden Curl snuck off to Silk Tie castle

Silkworm Samuri fired each employee there on the spot

Trying to cool the whole town down his daughter running hot

Food stamp lava lamp Bigfoot and Lulu skip outtta town

Renegade was going up and Baby Curl was going down

Belly and Isabella ran away while Silk Tie and Lucy split

Every batter gets a splatter when the fan gets hit with shit

 

 

 

ONE SHOT….8 Mile (an hour)

one shot

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity for a life reboot to seize everything you ever wanted, one moment. Would you capture it, or just let it slip. Yo

His hands are wrinkled, knees arthritic, palms sweaty and paralytic
Moms spaghetti he’ll discard again
There’s vomit on his cardigan, oops he slipped out a fart again, hope it doesn’t spot again
He’s quiet and nervous cause it was during church service
So he pretends it was gods purpose
But he dropped a bomb and he keeps forgettin
He keeps on sweating and just can’t remember
So he wrote it down and the nursing crowd gets so loud
He opens his mouth but nothing comes out
He’s choking, I’m not joking’ better get Heimlich I think he’s croaking
He’s bout to lose himself, the moment got to own it

Okay, no more M&M Bee Rabbit parodying, down to serious business

What if you could go back and change one thing from your past? Would you? And which moment? Of course you could go back to that time you took your first drink, or first joint, or not meet the person who introduced you to drugs but chances are it would only re-occur again at some other point. You could not meet and marry that one person who you regret but it may mean not having had some beautiful children, or maybe you would have been drawn to someone who did you even worse. So when a good friend asked me what I would change if I could go back and change only one thing from my past to make my present life better I had no answer. I told him “I don’t take much stock in that Wonderful Life George Bailey could have made a huge difference bullshit” Then it struck me because one of the words I used in my answer caused me to have a change of heart. The word stock. Like stock in Apple? No, I would’ve made a lot money but that’s not a paradigm shift. Stock up on Karma? Good thought, but no. It was Woodstock. How much would my life have changed if my older brother took me to Woodstock??

If I had an opportunity to go back into my timeline to make one adjustment I would choose to go back to Long Island when I was 14 and my brother was 17 smack him upside the head to tell him take his little brother to that little rock concert in upstate New York. It was almost his duty. Besides, as my big brother he was aware that my birthday was in July and Woodstock would have been the birthday present of the century. Granted at the time it only seemed as though it would be just another outdoor rock concert not the society altering rock statement of all time, but even so he should have taken me. Not that I hold it against that teenage piece of dogshit on my shoe excuse of a brother for not realizing how important it was but it kinda is on a big brothers job description. Like #1 rule, teach your little brother about coolness.

I admit that at the time I was grounded for some lame excuse my parents invented, or maybe I screwed up but that’s not what’s important. This rock concert loomed far more profound than mere parental acquiescence and would have been worth a groundation for the rest of the summer as far as I‘m concerned. At 14 years old I was ready for a Woodstock transformation. I had already made the leap from pop music to rock over a year ago when a friend in my eighth grade shop class lent me this album of his brothers by Iron Butterfly. Adios Monkees and Cowsills, hola psychedelic rock. As if the bands name itself wasn’t cool enough it had one long psychedelic song with swirling organ riffs, a killer drum solo, and some hard as hell guitar playing. Inna Gadda Da Vida! Not just music I was also building up a tolerance to cheap beer (Piels, Shlitz, PBR etc.), I knew how to remove the stems and seeds from reefer (using the album cover of Iron Butterfly) and how to portion off chunks of hash for optimal smoking pleasure. I wasn’t the best joint roller yet but practice will make perfect. I had tried uppers and downers and was primed and ready for some hallucinogens. What better place to have had my first trip than at Woodstock?

Imagine….. I’m looking around at all the weirdo’s and hippies, love children, flower children, and all the colors. So many colors and perspectives. Bending tangerine tree’s and marmalade endless skies. My brains would leave my head for a while and swirl around observing while my smile muscles stretched themselves to their limits and I would laugh for the entire weekend just taking it all in. The music would have infiltrated me ears to fill up my soul. Sometimes the music would make me dance like no one was watching and other times send me into groovy grooving trance. I would have been lifted to a higher plane, a new dimension of sight and sound absorbing all the cosmic energy the hippie counter culture had to offer. Enlightened, I would have found my Zen at age fourteen while enjoying three days of drugs, sex, and rock and roll. (Since it’s me doing the imagining it was a lot of sex. Really really good sex). I would have had a weekend of constant epiphanies, one after the other that would have left me totally altered, a new person. Basically being at Woodstock would have changed my life dramatically

Not that I was totally without rock and roll experiences I had already been to three concerts before Woodstock came around. Three Dog Night (with Stevie Wonder, Bloodrock, and Seals and Crofts), The James Gang, and Grand Funk Railroad, so it was the perfect opportunity for me to learn about outdoor rock concerts, tripping and what the hippies were all about. A bunch of my friends and I talked about going but it was mostly bravado and wishful thinking. At fourteen resources are limited. But at Seventeen my brother was the perfect age for Woodstock. Unfortunately he and his friends were far more interested in scoring with the ladies than scoring concert tickets for themselves and their little brothers. WTF? I mean they let me play football and baseball with them, they let me hang out after the games with them, hang out at the beach, I did all kinds of shit with the older kids. So why the hell did they not all get together and say “yo Jameson, why don’t we get some tickets for this Woodstock thing and take little JT?” But Nooooooooo! They wanted to get laid instead. (which probably didn’t happen that weekend anyway)

So that’s what I would change if I could go back. That would be my one shot. To force my brother to take me to Woodstock. If that had happened I would have had my first real religious out of body experience and would have converted to Hippieism much earlier than I did. Maybe even become a high (very high at times) priest, or Exalted Guru or something. I coulda been a contender. I would more than likely become focused my studies in some form of music or something or maybe seek the path of a journalist to write about important political happenings in the counter culture. Perhaps I would have been a revolutionary or at least a high (yes, very high at times) functioning member of the Peace Corps. Going to Woodstock is the one thing I can think of that would have truly changed my life. If I had that one shot, one moment to seize everything I wanted it wouldn’t have slipped away, it would have been my life changing moment. Being at Woodstock would have reshaped my entire life. Oh well, at least I have a plethora of Grateful Dead concerts on my cosmic resume…. What would you do?
PEACE

Joint Therapy for Manic Monday

joint therapy

Every Monday it starts out the same way
Complaining about everything just to complain
Worthless words ponding with hammer force
Another set of vocal nails piercing my brain

Why not just shut up, stop the barrage
Everybody has got their own issues
They continue filling me full of their woes
Chill out with a damn handful of tissues

But the bitching keeps pounding into my ears
Until my brain feels like its gonna burst
Full of opinions and my coworkers gripes
Bitchin’ and moanin’ is the absolute worst

Gotta go or I’ll blow today
Gotta fly or I’ll die today
Gimme crap and I’ll snap
Shut your trap or I’ll slap today
No more flap no more yap
Your gonna get a wrap
Cant take no more of this crap today
I gotta get away
Everybody just shut
Its time to cut
And escape this damn rut

Slipping away to commune with mother nature
Dried out, seedless, and rolled in a nice fat stick
Strike a match and inhale the sweet ass relief
Oh yea much better man that does the trick

As the fumes rise up I feel the happy go in
Gently tugging at my mouth and I smile
Music rocks to push out the people poison
Now I can finally relax and chill for a while

Their problems and gripes go out with the tide
Bullshit fades away sinking down the drain
Joint therapy makes me feel so damn good
One more doob to cancel the rest of the pain

One toke of the smoke
Bullshit starts to choke
A little marry jawanna
In my bathroom Nirvana
Herb bud of chronic
Ear bud of sonic
Add rock to the mix
Now I got my fix
Makes the deal so real
Stone mass appeal
I smile away merrily
Relief is joint therapy
Now me and my smirk
Can get back to work
Until tomorrow

Rear View Paranoid

REAR-VIEW

I thought my life was flashing before my eyes as paranoia began creating a vortex for its ascent from my stomach up into my head. Fear shot electronic impulses through my entire body as the flashing continued. Get hold of yourself dude, everythings cool!! Its an actual flashing not my life flashing. A quick peek in the rear view mirror reveals there is a cop car advertising its intentions behind me in my car. The cop car drove past me in pursuit of another driver. My adrenal glands began chuckling as the paranoia flew out the window into the cosmos. Those flashing lights weren’t for me at all. The welcome relief washed over me but the tension remained. WTF? At this point of my life I am an upstanding law abiding citizen. Well aside from whatever I may do in the privacy of my own home but that’s my business. My car is legal, I drive and obey the traffic laws, (like never speed when a cop is near by, etc.) so I have no reason to fear even if I do get pulled over. I no longer keep any stashes under my seat or papers in the console. Hell man, I even had my seatbelt on. So why this rush of paranoia every time a cop is behind me when I drive? Primal evolutionary instinct? Not exactly but it can be traced back to my teen years.
Like most of the derelict suburban youths of my era my first contact with police outside of school visits, or watching Dick Tracy and Courageous cat and Minute Mouse, was our own teenage version of cat and mouse with the cops. We wanted to get drunk drinking cheap beer or wine and they wanted to catch us and sadistically pour it out while sarcastically letting us know we should head home to Mommy and Daddy. In truth it was an okay relationship for both parties, they could tell the adults in town that the streets were free of drunken degenerate teen hoodlums and we only had to cry over spilled beer, not get in big trouble with Mom and Dad. But it all changed when the evil Satan Smoke, Beelzebub bud, the Devils Weed crept its vile horned joint rolled self into our teen culture. The sinister antichrist herbal delight swept into our teen lungs, relieving our teen angst, making us teen laugh, giving us teen munchies, and made us feel all around teen fucking awesome.
Unfortunately the post teen portion of suburbia was not as enchanted with wacky weed as we were, they were certain it would turn each and every one of us into drug addicted serial killers who threaten to tear and shred the very fabric of their three martini society to shreds. Our relationship with the police altered drastically at this point. The police needed to massage the concerns of the scotch swilling adults assuring them no marijuana could find its way into their neighborhoods but we wanted to massage our minds with that very same illegal weed of wit and wisdom. Now our job as teens was to smoke pot and get high free of handcuffs and the cops hoped to arrest us and lock us up so the rest of society could rest easy knowing the refer mad hooligans were locked up alongside murderers, rapers, and armed robbers. Where we belonged. (is there a special font for sarcasm?) Then and only then could society relax and take a deep breath. Not a breath test, because I’m pretty certain most of our parents would register above the limit for alcohol. Anyway, the dichotomy changed, we found better hiding spots and continued our evil ways and cops continued in fruitless pursuit of passionate pot puffing juvenile perps.
Once we began driving however, the cops had the advantage. With badge comes privilege and the police were willing and able to take liberties in their attempts to remove our liberties. Now they could exact their revenge for our ability to avoid capture by flashing those strobe like red lights to pull us over on a minor violation accomplishing two things. First they knew that it sent a surge of paranoia through our circulatory systems causing discomfort, perhaps even incontinence. That’s the primal response I was speaking of earlier. Secondly, a pull over and the badge equipped them with everything they needed to search our cars to find out where we kept our hash pipes or hidden stashes, because they knew we were still prolifically puffing the perverse pot of decadence. With any luck they would then have the opportunity to use the Miranda right speech they had committed to memory for real. The bust of the neighborhood, a few more hardened (well stoned anyway) criminals locked away making society safe to continue forcing its backward values on their youths.
So now, even when I’ve reached the age where high school students read about our antics of demonstrating while high on the woeful weed in their history classes I still stiffen in paranoia when a cops lights flash in my mirror. That’s living proof of evolution right there, my brain has adapted to the fear of danger caused by flashing red lights just as our ancestors developed the fight or flight response from being chased by ferocious human devouring animals. My children probably have this red light fear gene embedded in their DNA already. Or maybe its just a stoner reaction. If that’s the case I wonder is if this paranoid phenomenon will ever cease. Will I ever be able to drive normally when a cop is behind me? Am I destined to peering behind my wheelchair in the old folks home if a light flickers while rolling to early bird dinner?
I get that the institution of policing is important, ever since I reached the point I understood I really never was invincible I understood that believing in anarchy is a part of teen angst coming of age, but like I said, I obey laws. For the most part anyway, and the few laws I may bend are hardly worth punishing because I obviously will never learn and will never consider my minor indiscretions to be evil or wrong. But seriously guys, there must be a way to break this cycle of fear every time I see a cop.
PEACE