Subliminal Chaos


Rock In Peace Robin……

Scorching flames of despair
Stretching the covers obscure
Across the evenings lonely wind
Truths are humble and demure

Stalking the corridors your head
You don’t suspect I’m even there
Your world gyrating upside down
Ambition vanishes into thin air

Feel the eyes around the corner
Giggles and insults from the shade
Suppress the facts deny the deed
Your secrets have been displayed

I creep within perceived reflection
I’m paranoia and I’m here to stay
Spit out all your shards of hope
Secretly haunting you every day

Twisted insecurities are what I give
Until your no longer able to cope
Tease you with artificial mind duller
Get you stone drunk or feed you dope

Because deep inside your thoughts I hide
Hidden from all right in plain sight
No one see’s the damage I inflict
Yet I’m driving you in your plight

What the Hell is wrong with you?
Why do you exist?
I know the reason you should die
I wrote the fucking list

You’re worthless no one likes you
Your world is a façade
I’ll crash land you into death
And end your endless fraud
Follow me

Jerome John Garcia (Aug 1, 1942-Aug 9, 1995)

da boyz

Reluctant Guru and voice of the psychedelic generation, Jerry was complicated and human despite the seemingly superpower ability of moving so many of us to amazing heights during his incredible career. With his guitar he transformed an entire arena of fans from the mundane and often tedious world into a world filled with constant joy and pleasure in an indescribable Jerry zone. So indescribable that back in the day most of us fans would simply proclaim our mantra, “There is nothing like a Grateful Dead concert” And that’s truly the only way to explain it, you needed to experience the transformation yourself to fully comprehend how insanely phenomenal it was. His voice and guitar wrapped us up in a protective cocoon and in mid show taught us to spread our wings. A concert hall full of beautiful butterflies mesmerized by one common theme, peace and love. I miss the privilege of watching them perform and most specifically being fortunate enough to allow Jerry to take me away with him on his improvisational jams. One day a jazzy set, one day Latin influence, tribal beats or maybe a deep Elem blues set you never knew what to expect from the genius guitar player from California. We miss you Jerry, thank you for the years of intense pleasure. Following is a tribute to what you’ve meant to many of us in general, and me in particular. It’s composed of many references to songs we loved and memories implanted or just improvisational word association in the sprit of the king of musical improv.


When the song is done
The strings are unstrung
Songs go unsung
An empty feeling in the air
Ticketron memories remain
Waiting in vain
Our mission in the rain
Outside the concert halls
Kids climbing the walls
For a chance to get inside
All fried and wide eyed
To see a band beyond description
Jehovah’s favorite choir
But no matter how they prayed
The encores have all been played
No more road trips
Or fools ships
Searching for tix
Off we bounded
At risk of being grounded
Getting home late
Scamming to get through the gate
A simple twist of fate

No more mountains on the moon
No soothing tune
Toking one last bowl
To rock my soul
Where the river sings sweet songs
Flow big river flow
Cuz his words still glow
Like gold
Like a Ripple through still water
No pebble tossed
Ten million eyes glossed
And the Hunter is lost
Partner and friend
To the end
Who now has the time
To call his soul a critic
As we wait outside the lazy gate
Of winters summer home

Peeking through a lace banana
With a silver kimono chalice
This broke down Palace
Free of all malice
Unbroken chain
Mission in the rain
We hold you in the attics of lives
Fare ye well and so long
The river sings your sweet song
And fills the air
With that Jerry flair
To rock my soul
By the riverside
Fare the well
Saint Angel
Who can the weather command
Our favorite band

Take up your china doll
Its only fractured
In rapture
Magic wand in hand
Strumming his lightning bolts
My heart full of electric volts
Fragile peals of thunder
Took me under
He Shreds and rips
That Captain Trips
Took us away
For the day
Filled our hearts with emotion
With one searing motion
Strangers stopping strangers
Just to shake their hand
A giant of a man

But all that’s left is a trace
Of his inspiration
Yet still it flows
Suggesting rhythms
That shall not forsake you
But the song is sung and done
Thought We’d only just begun
I’ll meet you on the run
At the jubilee
Seldom turns out the way it does in the song
On a trip strange and long
But not long enough

William Tell has stretched his bow
Till it will stretch no furthermore
What for written on the morning sky
I shrug and say good bye
Lady fingers dipped in moonlight
Counting stars by candlelight
Only one is bright
Light a candle curse the glare
The choice of The Bear
And his magic elixir
In the dark
Light the songs with sense and color
Hold away despair
Talent so rare

Must be getting early
Clocks are running late
Gone to where the wind don’t blow so strange
Like a steam locomotive
Rollin down the track
He’s gone
He’s gone
Nothings gonna bring him back
He’s gone
And these spaces fill with sadness
The obvious hidden
In the shadow of the moon
And We’ll all be there real soon
To where the compass always points
Heavens mutation
Terrapin Station

If you could
I know you would
Dust of those rusty strings just one more time
And let it shine
Let the broken angel sing
From your guitar
One last Dark Star
But it all rolls into one
And one man gathers what another man spills
The pills
The smoke
Laughing when their ain’t no joke
Was all part of the show
The magic show
The grateful scene
Best I’ve ever seen
Or ever will
The last rose has pricked our fingers
Its time for us to sing our own songs
But your music never stopped
For me it never will
I carry it with me always

Rock In Peace Jerry Garcia

Underneath the warmth and openness we all felt from Jerry lay a deep well of an understaning, that we all have a dark side. Jerry used that dark understanding like many atrists to create, and what jerry created was some of the most haunting, real, and downright ornery riffs and vocalizations in all of rock. There was a near eerie connection between Jerry and the collective consciousness of his fans which flowed through his fingers, dancing along his guitar strings and into our souls which lifted us up taking us away with him to wherever his trip was headed that particular evening. If only for a few hours we all existed in a utopian world led by the pied piper who tapped in to our every emotion, from the highest elations to the darkest corridors of our minds, pain and grief, fear and despair, or just plain euphoria and by the end of the evening returned us safely to our memories. It was an unexplainable esoteric bond that can only be wrapped up by saying because of Jerry‘s unique ability to convey through his essence how great life can be, there was nothing like a Grateful Dead concert, and sadly there will never be again. Rock In Peace Jerry, we miss you!

Mood Seller


Shaking the vial to the beat of your mood
Selling you happy the peddler so shrewd
Maybe you just need some laughter to start
Keep you amused while your world falls apart

Bet your disposition you’ll no longer ache
Things for you to use- pills you can take
For total bliss all you need do is proceed
The mood seller knows your every need

Man on the street has something to peddle
Put your life on the fast track pedal to metal
He’ll sell you a promise of part time release
Won’t charge you your soul just merely a piece

Mood seller help me please sell me a good mood
My life really sucks and everyone treats me rude
Don’t know how much more of this crap I can take
I’m completely unstable I tremble and shake

What mood do you need to make your life sweet
I’ve got moods that’ll knock you right off of your feet
Red capsules for happy the blue’s make you brave
I’ve got one thing or another for all that you crave

Let you run all day and not break a sweat
I even have powders to make you forget
If you have the money I have what you need
Open your mind and wallet and you will succeed

Mood seller help me please sell me a mood
My lovers unfaithful my boss is so crude
I get flustered and nervous around every crowd
I can’t sleep at night voices shout much to loud

I’m edgy and nervous get angered so easy
Can’t stand all these people calling me sleazy
I’m confused discontented not at all happy
I drink all the time yet I’m still feeling crappy

I’m frightened of clowns, spiders and snakes
I not really sure if I have what it takes
I need to get my life back into control
All of this bullshit is taking its toll

Relax my friend and come into my palace
Here you never get treated with malice
Let me make you a cocktail of magical pills
Remove all your anxiety cure all of your ills

Or how bout a tab from the mystical wizard
The wing of a bat plus the sweat of a lizard
Distortions and insights will give you elation
An additional bonus of hallucination

Or maybe this powder is more up your alley
Removes all the world in one rushing finale
I’ll even throw in a few grains of some speed
Total annihilation may be just what you need

Mood seller mood seller sell me relief
Beacon of hope please remove all my grief
Make me forget why I want life to end
I’ve plenty of money I’m willing to spend

Step right in and we’ll bond in collusion
Life isn’t real friend its merely an illusion
Something chronic to ease all the tension
We’ll just chalk it up as suicidal prevention

The mood seller cares not just who you are
Plenty of more buyers to swing on a star
The seller of moods only wants you alive
So his unethical businesss will continue to thrive

He’ll offer you solace a phony belief
don’t let him ruse you or sell you relief
He’ll pull down his gimmicks off of a shelf
You’ll end up a mere shattered shell of yourself

Flightless bird


Trapped in the bedroom
No wings for flight
Ineffective refusal
Surrendering in fright

Unwilling arousal
Tenderly employed
No reciprocation
The master is annoyed

Fear driven desire
Superficial stimulation
Ecstatic and gloomy
Ersatz reciprocation

Blurred line of vision
Hazy scarlet eyes
Standing with bravado
Tearfully she denies

Brutally reminded
Of gilded bedroom cage
Returns artificial pleasure
Consuming it with rage

Ire charged erotic
Wistful in the night
Engage in passion play
The bird is poised for flight

She never flies away
Saddest story I ever heard
Sexually imprisoned
Rue the flightless bird