A Weekend To Forget

Me and my droogs had just finished some moloko plus at the Milk Bar and had zero pretty polly in our wallets. “Oh my dear droogies methinks the hour has arrived for some ultra violence and some crasting to fill our pockets with kuppit. Lets go find Billy Boys gang and kick all four in the yarbles till the rich red krovvy runs from their rots. Then we’ll tolchock some vellochek and crast all his cutter so we can peet some more moloko.” All agreed and out out out we went into the night. Shortly we came across Billy Boy and his shaika of like gloopy moodges and the tolchoking began. So angry was your humble narrator that I pulled out my britvah and sliced old Billy boys yahzik and kicked his zoobies in. Sirens abounded and millicents in blue uniforms were everywhere. “Come along droogies, we don’t want to end up in Staja.”
Running away laughing all we were now having a real horrorshow time. Dim spoke up, “How abouts some of the old in and out with the devotchkas Alex?” Being a good leader I chose to agree and off we set to the suburbs. We came across a small cottage where resided a like older chelloveck and his beautiful zheena. We tricked him into allowing us entrance and I instructed Dim and the others to perform some ultr-violence on the chellovecks while I sodded the mans hot dama. With my panhandle in hand I did the old in and out whilst singing in the rain was sung by yours truly. I could hear the old chelloveck creeching in pain. Each of my droogs took their turns as I surveyed the cottage for cutter or goods to fence. Beethoven was playing on the record which made your truly smile, when suddenly I saw it! A Belgian ale name Defiant. I could like sense my droogies lubidubbing the pitsa as she creeched in a like poogly voice.
What a great weekend it was, fun times with friends, some sodding and groompy sex with a young sharp, and to top it off a bottle of delicious Defiant triple ale from Belgium. What a fantastic memorial day weekend. Well at least it was until your humble friend and narrator was arrested by the razz’s, put in prison and subjected to the Ludoviko Technique of aversion therapy which stripped me of my free will.

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